Birthday Boy

This weekend was my son's 11th birthday. I had been praying fervently for his party to be special since I knew I had very limited resources to put toward a party. So I made a cake (chocolate, of course) and decorated it. Since he's now 11, he's not into anything fancy (like the Lego cake he had one year or the airplane one.) So we went for a simple theme -- cake and ice cream, a few balloons, a big bowl of candy instead of goody bags, and lots of friends.

It turned out to be a huge success. All the kids had a blast exploring in the jungle behind my house. Then one of my adventurous friends had the brilliant idea of hooking up a zip line. Well, that just put this birthday party over the top! We were all having so much fun hanging out around the fireplace, riding the zip line, playing Capture-the-Flag that no one wanted to leave. So we ended up ordering pizza and the two-hour party turned into six. It was great!




We ask God for little things, and He gives so much more! My son told me later that night, "Mom, everyone at my party respects me. I mean, really respects me!" For a boy, the best gift he could have gotten -- respect. How generous of the Lord to give my son, not only an awesome birthday party, but what his heart needed most!

Loved Outrageously

I heard this today from another site. Wow! This is amazing! I want the truth of these words to sink deep and take root.

"The Lord says that there is nothing you can do that would make Him love you more. There is also nothing you can do that would make Him love you less.

He loves you because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you... Because that is what He is like. It is His nature to love, and you will always be the Beloved.

His love is unchanging. He loves you 100 percent. And He won't love you any better when you become better. He loves you 100 percent.

And even if you have no plans to become better, He will still love you anyway. Because He loves you. Because that's the way He is.

And even if you don't want to change, He will love you 100 percent. Even if you have no plans to walk with Him, that's His nature -- He loves all the way, all the time.

His love is unchanging.
"But what will change is your ability to receive my love," says the Lord.

"Open your heart," says the Lord, "and you will receive more of My love than you have ever experienced before. You are the Beloved -- it is your job to be loved outrageously. It is why I chose you. It is why I set my love upon you, that you would live as one who is outrageously loved. That you would receive a radical love -- so radical it'll blow all your paradigms of what you think love is.

I will love you outrageously all the days of your life, because I don't know how to be any different. This is who I AM."

- Taken from "Inheritance" by Graham Cooke. Artwork by Jean Keaton

"And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge -- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."
Eph. 3:17-19

Through the eyes of kids -- What is God like?

I found these kids' quotes from Tales of Wonder blog. Aren't they hilarious? Enjoy!

WHAT GOD IS LIKE:

God is really, really, really old—like 23. But he never looks a day older every time you see him.

God has many kinds of hair, but he keeps them short.

God is as far as numbers go. He’s too old for age.

God watches over us all the time. He has lots of eyes—like spiders.

In the beginning, God created heaven and earth. Now he just does people.

He has a gray beard. He’s at least a hundred years old. That’s why it’s gray. Used to be brown.

He looks a lot like Jesus, but with a mustache.


THINGS KIDS SAY TO GOD:

I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was cool. - Eugene

Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident? – Norma

Are you really invisible or is that just a trick? – Lucy

How do You get those leaves to grow back onto the trees? And how do You keep grass growing back, no matter how many times it gets cut off? Now that’s something (David, age 8)

I don’t think anybody could be a better God. Well, I just want you to know but I am not just saying that because you are God. - Charles

Adventure

As 2008 faded away and the kids and I celebrated the dawn of 2009, I found myself with a whole jumble of emotions I didn't know what to do with. In fact, all of last week was just tough.

I remember going into 2008 with hopes of a healed marriage and timidly trusting God to do something big. But barely into the year, I found myself on the road to Florida with my two kids, feeling like refugees seeking shelter with family, and the specter of divorce staring me in the face.

The Lord has done something big, but most of it was in my heart. I'm not that same woman I was a year ago. It's been worth all the pain to discover the love God has for me. But honestly, I don't want to live through another year like the last one. And I think that's been my unconscious fear -- that 2009 will be even harder.

So God and I have been talking. I keep bringing up my fears and inabilities. He keeps saying, "Trust Me." I look at Him and I want to trust that He has something wonderful for me. But He's so big and wild and adventurous. It scares me. Part of me wants to shrink back inside my little box and hide. That's been my tendency my whole life. Play it safe, follow the rules, hide.

There is no more little box and no place to hide. I'm already in His adventure and there's no turning back. We've crossed over into a new country. I get the sense it's really beautiful here with wide open spaces. Plenty of room to run, dance and be myself. But I don't know what it all means or what to do with it.

I'm realizing that God has bigger dreams for me than I do. And He's eager to see me begin living them.

"Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me. See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come. . . Arise, come, my darling, my beautiful one. Come with me." Song of Songs 2:11-13

Empty

I've been doing some reflecting on the past year and all that God has done for me. There is so much to thank Him for. This has been such a difficult and painful year in many, many ways. Yet it's also been incredibly beautiful and amazing as I've seen the Lord take care of me and hold me through everything.

It's been a year of paradox, everything upside down. Acceptance in the middle of rejection, joy in the middle of sadness and grief, beauty out of desolation, abundance in the midst of poverty. I have been very blessed in so many ways that really matter.

But there are times I wake up in the morning and I find myself empty, with a restless longing for something more. I don't always recognize this deep need in myself; it usually takes a while. After attempting to satisfy this heart hunger with entertainment, other people, chocolate, even spiritual activities, or trying to distract myself with new ideas, work, housecleaning, facebook, whatever -- I find myself just getting frustrated and the longing has only intensified.

I've even found myself thinking that if my husband's heart changes and he returns to us, then I will be satisfied and have my heart's desire. Or someday when I'm doing what I was created for and fulfilling my purpose in life, then I will be filled up. I just have to wait for those things. But the honest truth is that I will still be hungry and empty even then.

What I'm realizing is that this deep need is my heart's longing for God. He has done so much for me and shown me so much of His love for me, especially this past year, that I would have thought that would be enough. But I'm discovering that it's not. I need more.

I was created empty. That is my supreme offering to the Lord -- me, with all my lack, my failure, my inability, my weakness, my empty heart. I'm seeing that it is His great joy and pleasure to fill me with Himself. That's what He's been waiting for. And maybe the truth is that this inner restless longing is simply His gift to draw me into a deeper intimacy than I can imagine. And I will find that when I have Him, I have everything.

So I wait -- empty and thankful for it, trusting Him to fill me and satisfy me when He wants to and in His good time.

"Satisfy us in the morning with Your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days." Psalm 90:14

Quotes

Some things to ponder --

To do for yourself the best that you have it in you to do - to grit your teeth and clench your fists in order to survive the world at its harshest and worst — is by that very act, to be unable to let something be done for you and in you that is more wonderful still. The trouble with steeling yourself against the harshness of reality is that the same steel that secures your life against being destroyed secures your life also against being opened up and transformed by the holy power that life itself comes from. You can even prevail on your own. But you cannot become human on your own. - Fredrick Buechner

I am not what I ought to be. I am not what I want to be. I am not what I hope to be. But still, I am not what I used to be. And by the grace of God, I am what I am. - John Newton

Maybe when we truly trust God we are empowered to trust others, because the outcome of our trust -- for better or for worse -- is in God's providential hands. - Jason Brian Santos

Not only do we not know God, except through Jesus Christ, we do not even know ourselves except through Jesus Christ. - Blaise Pascal

The issue of your ‘name’ is the concept of your essential being by which you live. God has His own name for us all. And to live out of your in-God-identity you must refuse the many names, labels, roles imposed on you. If the enemy can superimpose a ‘name’ on you . . . you have become who you are not.

This matter of identity is crucial to live for God in a hostile world. If you take your personhood from the world, you lose God. If you take on your 'new creation' - your new existence, the world cannot oppress you or own you.
- Martha Kilpatrick

I am more me now than I used to be.
- Angela

"If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation."
2 Cor. 5:17

The Tree

I've inherited a Christmas tree from the friends whose house I'm renting. Back in July, when I first moved in, I noticed the tree in a box in the garage. I was thankful that we would have a tree but didn't give it much thought since December seemed so far away.

But now that Thanksgiving has come and gone, it's time to prepare for Christmas. So the plan was for the kids and I to put it up and decorate it in the evening. I had visions of us sipping hot cocoa and admiring our beautiful tree.

After school, the kids and I went to Walmart to buy a few bulbs to decorate our Christmas tree. All our normal Christmas decorations are in storage in another state along with everything else. So I wanted to get a few items but not go overboard.

We got home, ate supper and I told my son he could start bringing in the tree pieces. After multiple trips to the garage to get branch after branch, I started to realize that this tree may be bigger than I thought.

As it began to take shape, I knew the truth. This was God's tree. He provided it. So it stands to reason that it would be MASSIVE!!!! The thing is huge!!! It stands at least 7 feet high, by far the largest tree I've ever decorated or owned. It's also very wide. The small area of the living room I had picked out for the tree to stand in was not going to work. So my kids and I rearranged the furniture and now our tree dominates a corner of the room. (Or should I say, stands regally and majestically.)

My 20 bulbs are hardly visible. You need binoculars to find them in all the branches. I'm going to have to get more decorations, because my tiny collection isn't going to cut it. (By the way, that picture I included is not The Tree. I don't have a camera so had to cut and paste.) Anyway, we'll have to finish decorating after I make another trip to the store.

But it was just hilarious looking at that thing last night. It's like way overkill for one woman and her two kids. I know God was laughing. When I look at that tree, I see the lavishness of God. It's a reminder.

I only ask for little things and expect small things from the Lord. But He has a much grander, more immense and MASSIVE plan in mind and THAT is what He wants to give me. He just asks me to trust Him and wait and dream BIG.

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine, according to His mighty power at work within us." Eph. 3:20